Womanliness is the New Feminism


Chaucer Loves Women "Do you believe in feminism then?", delivered in a somewhat accusatory tone, was the response to my telling someone that I run the Be the Woman You were Born to Be Online Course and Community.

My experience tells me that any word that ends in -ism has a closed outlook, is somehow limiting, fractionalising something to compartmentaise it into a pigeon-hole to fit into someone else's judgement and opinion. Feminism has shrunk an issue which is absolutely fundamental to our society as a whole into considering facets and not the whole.

My reply therefore was "Womanliness is what we need to focus on", not quite the response that was expected from my interrogator.

Being a woman is a total experience in who you are, not what you have and do. It's not about the beliefs and clothes you have, nor about the job that you do, nor how busy you are. Yes we have equal rights to be who we are. To date these have often been translated to mean equal rights to pay, jobs, opportunities, sexual adventures and education to name but a few, many of which were embraced in the feminism ideal of being entitled to it all. Only it doesn't seem to have worked does it? I see very few women around who have it all and are glowing with health, contentment and satisfaction, radiating an attitude of calm enjoyment of life.

A woman is de facto not a man. We come with different needs, skills and instructions and often these are overlooked, unrecognised and not passed down from generation to generation. The focus has become on being the same as men and being asked to fit into a system like men, as honorary men, and then decorating it all in girly frills. That corporate structures talk so much about management surely gives the game away as to where the problems actually lie.

There is a beautiful saying by Ben Johnson, a poet in England a few hundred years ago:

"She is Venus when she smiles, Juno when she walks and Minerva when she talks."

That sums up what makes a woman a woman. When you have presence, you will naturally smile. There will be an environment of loveliness around you. You walk with a majesty and regality. People know deep down that you represent something they want to stand for.

Do you?

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